Sickening Feeling, Not Always A Bad Thing......

This morning as I was making my coffee God felt the need to remind me of some of the times when he has used me to speak to people, most recently this past Sunday morning at church. I was unsure of the purpose of this at first but as I got to thinking why he could possibly want me to remember these things on this particulair day and then I remember a conversation I had with a good frind just a couple nights ago. She knows God wants her to do something but is scared of what the consequences may be if she does indeed talk to this person. So this is kinda for her (she knows who she is).

I got to thinking about when I feel like God wants me to tell someone sonething and how I feel, because afterwards its easy to forget how difficult it was to actually do it because I now see the positive outcomes of the situations. I remember one time inparticulair when I was at bible study at a friends house and God kept speaking the word "comforter" not sure what this meant I just kinda pushed it aside thinking I would figure it out later but God didn't quit I eventually had to get up and write down what I was being told and look up the verses he had given me. At that point I knew I was supposed to give this to someone but wasn't sure who, it was then that I recieved a text and I then knew who it was for. I just so happened to be the last person in the world that I wanted to give it to (go figure right). Needless to say I argued with God pretty much the entire ride home and told him I didn't want to do it but ultimately I decided okay I will do it. However when I got back to my dorm I began having second thoughts and doubting if tis was even God or if I was doing the right thing. I literally felt sick to my stomach with nerves and I had to do something so I called my friend and asked her to come to my room. When she got there I almost backed out yet again but before I could just handed her the paper with everything God had spoken to me on it she read it and guess what it was exactly what she needed on that day.

This wasn't the first or last time this has happened to me but I have recently come to the conclusion that when I begin to doubt something or question something that has been consistantly pulling at me for a long period of time it is usually God and the enemy is trying to keep me from being a witness. So I just have to suck up and do it and I have yet to be let down by God. I trust that he is the one speaking and not myself and I know he ALWAYS has the words that need to be said and that I myself am not the one that is helping the person involved.

The Thoughts That Kept Me Up

It's been a couple weeks since I have posted mainly because I really haven't had anything to say. However, tonight while I was getting ready for bed a had about a million things running through my min and yet not a single answer or solution for any of them. It was then I was prompted to get out my Bible because afterall it seems to always have the answers I need. I hate that i don't read it as much as I should but am always glad when I do decide to study and read The Word. Tonight God led me to Romans 12, a chapter that seems to be coming up alot in my life lately, so I decided to read it and it answered one of the most resounding questions in my head right now.

What significance do I have in the body of Christ?

Romans 12 discusses how every body has parts and no matter the size they all serve a very significant and much needed job all the way from the heart to your pinky toe each part is needed in order for the body to function normally. This is the same with a spiritual body. It goes on to say that people are called to do and be different things and you are to do what you are called fully, If you are called to prophessy then prophessy, if your called to teach then teach. I have recently learned that you don't have to be a preacher or evangelist or miracle worker to be a minister of the gospel. I have learned that sometimes the most powerful ministers are the high school teachers who never turn a child down who needs a friend, or a factory worker who always has a smile, or the janitor who never has a negative thing to say.

I am learning that though I may not know right now exactly what God has planned for my future that if I do what I can for him now it's all going to pan out as it should. Romans 12 also says to love sincerely and right now even if that's all I have to contribute to the kingdom then I will do it with all that I have, because how am I to know who it could touch and what lives it could reach. I ask for anyone who is reading this to pray for me that I can listen and obey what God calls me to do in the future and I also ask that you consider and pray about it in your own lives.

It's rare that God gives me a specific verse or chapter to read but when he does I always get such great insight and tonight I just felt it would be nice to share. However now it is off to bed I am exhausted and just want to sleep so good night everyone!!

So haven't really posted since I got home from Jamaica, mainly because I haven't had a whole lot to say but I figured what the heck I will just update my whole probably two readers on my life.
I got back from Jamaica on the 20th of June and spent a week just relaxing around the house getting used to the way things work in America again and then on the 27th I was off again!
My mom and her fiance' were headed up to the northeastern US towards Boston and New Hampshire, Connecticut and all that to visit some of his family, and since I had never been to any of those places I decided to tag along. So now I am sitting in a hotel room on a not so comfortable bed waiting on them to be ready to go so that we can go say our goodbyes and get on our plane to head home.
Once I get home who knows what my plans for the rest of the smmer will be they seem to come along as they do and I just go with it. Hoping to get back home, meaning, Clarksville, sometime before Auguest to visit soome friends from high school and some family. Then its off to school in August!!! I absolutely can NOT wait I miss that place mroe than I ever thought I would!!!!! I will once again be changing my major this time I am most positivie it is permanent because I really feel Adolescent psych is the perfect place for me to be.

Alright I will quit boring everyone with my plans now and get off of here and clean up so we can go.
Peace :)