This morning as I was making my coffee God felt the need to remind me of some of the times when he has used me to speak to people, most recently this past Sunday morning at church. I was unsure of the purpose of this at first but as I got to thinking why he could possibly want me to remember these things on this particulair day and then I remember a conversation I had with a good frind just a couple nights ago. She knows God wants her to do something but is scared of what the consequences may be if she does indeed talk to this person. So this is kinda for her (she knows who she is).
I got to thinking about when I feel like God wants me to tell someone sonething and how I feel, because afterwards its easy to forget how difficult it was to actually do it because I now see the positive outcomes of the situations. I remember one time inparticulair when I was at bible study at a friends house and God kept speaking the word "comforter" not sure what this meant I just kinda pushed it aside thinking I would figure it out later but God didn't quit I eventually had to get up and write down what I was being told and look up the verses he had given me. At that point I knew I was supposed to give this to someone but wasn't sure who, it was then that I recieved a text and I then knew who it was for. I just so happened to be the last person in the world that I wanted to give it to (go figure right). Needless to say I argued with God pretty much the entire ride home and told him I didn't want to do it but ultimately I decided okay I will do it. However when I got back to my dorm I began having second thoughts and doubting if tis was even God or if I was doing the right thing. I literally felt sick to my stomach with nerves and I had to do something so I called my friend and asked her to come to my room. When she got there I almost backed out yet again but before I could just handed her the paper with everything God had spoken to me on it she read it and guess what it was exactly what she needed on that day.
This wasn't the first or last time this has happened to me but I have recently come to the conclusion that when I begin to doubt something or question something that has been consistantly pulling at me for a long period of time it is usually God and the enemy is trying to keep me from being a witness. So I just have to suck up and do it and I have yet to be let down by God. I trust that he is the one speaking and not myself and I know he ALWAYS has the words that need to be said and that I myself am not the one that is helping the person involved.
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